okies.. here's my weekly update.. erm.. i would like to say about dawn's b'day celebration first cox it's like been 2 weeks after the actual thingy. not tt i dun wanna update abt it, but juz tt i hope to write and post e pics together :) anyways, so here's how we spent the day with her.

1st & 2nd March:

after i met her at ps (was wif reei be4 tt), we headed to the hotel and she confessed that its her first time to e hotel as her bf's mum is veri kind to help her book it. and yes, am not veri confident and a lil scared cox we both are not veri good in directions, ever since sec sch. haha! but well, i muz say tt she became smarter, as least she went online to look for directions be4 she came over. haha! and yar so we reached e hotel first and went up to the room. well it's not a grand or fine hotel, a lil sort of budget type i guess. haha! but, e room is pretty big. realli big. if i had known, we could haf gone earlier to get the room a lil deco up. haha. cox it's veri veri veri plain. haha! so yupz, we took pics together.. and i think its been 2 yrs since e last pics we took! machiam we went for NS! haha!!after tt, innyi joined us and we went to shop for lingerie, as dawn wanted a lingerie party after clubbing and all. but e thing is, she hasnt gotten hers yet. after she got a pj liked lingerie (haha!) we went to look at the village that she wanted to haf dinner at (heeren). BUT!!! closed down alr. and none of us knew. haha. we felt so stupid lar!!! and u noe, stupid things always come back to back. we wanted to head to the top floor as they've got a few restaurants. BUT!!! lvl 5 is closed for some renovations i think. so yar, we felt lost. den we decided to go to paragon and recce AGAIN! lol. finally, we decided on this jap rest. and we even had a lil high tea (dessert) there. haha. supposed to be a secret among 3 of us, cox we din wan e rest to noe tt we had a lil of sth be4 meeting them. BUT!!! as usual, dawn blew it all. lol!!!! during dinner she accidentally spilled it out. haha. anyways it's alrite lar. we juz had a good laugh. and e surprising thing was agustina told me tt she had chicken pox and cant make it. and am like WHAT!!! right after me? BUT!!! it's juz a fake thingy cox she wanted to surprise dawn. and she gang up wif innyi onli lar!!! come and bluff me!!!! haiz.. i felt so stupid again cx she was telling everyone how i was telling her what to avoid and stuff.. thanks ar gal.. haha anways, we had a good dinner, except the part when dawn wanted so much to give a mini speech. haha! no lar. i realli appreciated that. The Thomson sec and 1st TPY sec gals! Oh! forgot to mention that she invited her poly frens too. actualli i onli know and recognise one of them. so after dinner, we walked back to the hotel and prepare for clubbing!! supposed to leave earlier, but u noe gals.. we waited and chatted and dragged.. till i think i volunteered to change first, but dawn went ahead instead. i think we reached zouk abt 11plus? cant realli remember.. den.. we had 4 jugs of alcohol. i should not drink it, but since i've paid for it and it's like everyone is drinking, den i cant be a spoil sport rite. act i did forget tt i cant drink wen i gave e $. haha! but anways, got a lil high cox needa help them finish the drink asap so tt they would wanna lift their butts to head to the dance floor. seems like agustina, reb and innyi din like e atmosphere, thus they left early. dawn and asked mi if i wanna dance. of cox!!! i mean am like high alr if sit some more sure gone!! and so i led her down to the dance floor and she said sth veri weird, 'i trust u' haha! erm. anyways, i juz 'excuse me' all e way and am so surprised that there are so much space in the middle and ppl are juz watch by the side. oh yar, we danced a lil (actualli a lot) haha! e rest joined us and i muz say tt it's realli enjoyable dancing wif ya galfrens. we sticked so close to one another and its as if the rest were watching these 6 gals dancing. took pics on the dance floor and can see tt we're high rite! haha. i even "kissed" dawn. and she actualli cut the pic whereby onli 2 of us. haha! am not gonna pose tt up. its was all fun till we entered phuture. erm.. how should i say abt it... hmm.. its like the last 2nd song being played, and this guy approached steph and asked if he could dance together. she replied saying tt as a grp is fine. weirdly, he approached me and am like SIAM!!! haha. yea we chatted a lil but then wen he sort of grabbed me, i 'signalled' to steph tt i need SOS! haha! den she also grabbed me, hugged me and danced together. but if i din remember wrongly, he sorta pulled me back and started dancing again. den steph grabbed me again and turned ard. am so glad! thanks gal! but tt persistent person wun leave me alone wen i moved across the dance floor and head towards dawn. we're dancing happily until he grabbed me again! haha. i muz say tt he's high. den dawn did a super funny thing. she juz swiped his hands away from me and stared. haha! den, she grabbed me tight and danced. haha. thankx gal! so yar. after e last song, the chaotic grabbing session ended. we cabbed back to the hotel and steph was sorta drank. dawn, one of her fren and i went over to 7-11 to get some mineral water and food. after a bath, i went home wif agustina. thankx gals for e company and i hope dawn u realli enjoyed :) yar so tts abt it..

lala and mich have not sent me pics yet. so i guess will update later ba.. juz some tots for now..

well, my owner said to me tt am not quite me wen i chatted wif her on msn. but den, who am i actualli? i did most of the things alone nowadays and i felt tt am not connecting wif myself. walking aimlessly and there can be so much appearing in my head, but i cant focus at all. think i need more rest. nowadays, am not typing out wat i wanted to say on msn. most of the time, it's e opp from wat i meant, but den, i juz let it be. its kinda confusing. but am not going to think abt it. got assignments to focus on, and i've not let loose at all, i hope. i dun wanna be over reliance on someone, cox by e end of e day, am responsible for myself. i dun wanna give hope to myself, but i wanna do my best to fulfil. i dun wanna tell anyone abt anything, i juz wanna get over it. so wat is bothering me? i haf no idea.. confusing rite? but yar.. tts me, so get used to it. haha! tts e phrase tt i've been using for myself. get used to sth better than making it a habit. go nearer to listen to someone doesn't mean tt u're close to tt person. telling someone tt 'am like tt' doesnt mean tt u cant accomodate or be sensitive to others. admitting tt u're like tt yaself means tt u're aware. change is good isnt it? but sth is built-in and cant do much modification to it. a stubborn mind is juz like a software. u cant change anything in it, e only thing u can do is juz delete it, to stop it from bothering u. however, if u dun d/l the updates and learn how to use it, wats the use of tryin to upgrade yaself using tt software. many of times, fear overtakes and we do not acknowledge tt fear. why? putting up a strong front tt nuttin had happened and u can work ya way out? thinking tt fear is not going to help change the situation? i dun think so. look into ya fears. who's manipulating it? what triggered it? why did it happened? how can i not fear my fears? dun talk to yaself. talk to others. and listen to others. otherwise, whats e point of talking? yes, they're there to listen to ya, so pls listen to their concerns as well. who am i talking to? maybe myself. i dunno. but tt's probably the main things tt i've been thinking nowadays. well, there's no one right way to a problem, but there's definitely lots of wrong ways. so ya.. noe watcha doing cox nobody's gonna listen to ya after tt. wat problems am i facing? the inability to control my tots. i think. okie am gonna stop here or it'll juz go on and on... dun think u'll have e patience to read anyways. haha! alrites then. nitez.

Lots of loves, hugs n kisses,

Sharon